"Result has to be made" (Translation of October 30th article)

Hi it's Aya

We are back from Tottori!

And spending days in Tokyo and Nagano as usual

Everyday is truly made happen by so many people's support

Allowing us to move forward

To stay strong

And to continue making effort

For all of your support and passion,

Thank you so much!!!!

Because I can feel these encouragement from people,

I am always able to feel this very strong


Result is not something you wait for

But result is something that has to be made

Making effort is very important matter

But I do not like the kind of effort that only statisfies your feeling

I need the result

That is why

I do not want to wait for an outcome

But I want to make a result for the things that I have been doing

To give a meaning for the things that I have been doing

I believe it is a matter of how to preceive it

But I feel that

there is a kind of outcome that others make judgement on


there is a kind of outcome that is judged by yourself

No matter what happens,

It is you

Who can make it to "I am glad that has happened to me!"

Even if 100 out of 100 people would feel sorry for you,

You have the choice

With your effort afterward,

To make it to something that you appreciate it has happened to you

To put it in another words,

If I fall, I want to earn something as I get up

In order to do this,

It depends solely on my action after I fall or stumble

I dont want to regret my actions

Right now, I can only look forward and move forward

Even if it is hard

Even my heart is nearly crushed (or has been crushed)

I want to give a meaning for the things that I have been doing

By proceeding under such strong feeling,

A result will always be made

And sometimes, this can sound more like

An outcome had followed you

I wish I could describe this in a better way.....

But that is the best way I can say it now....

Right now, is the time to make the effort

To stay strong


Because we have these people who encourage us!!!


That is why, for this time of life, rather than giving up,

I wish him to keep challenging!!!!

Im sorry for an unorganized blog,

But we are able to keep trying because of your support!!!

Tonight's LOLO....


It seems a bit strange....


But I like it cause it's funny ^^


ga n ba re

It's been 3days since we arrived to Tottori

These days has been so fulfilling, it doesn't seems to be only 3 days

Junko san is our wonderful supporter in our entire schedule and also caring us mentally


She really giving us much hospitality in every detail

and most of all

really understanding our feelings in coming to a place completely new

Her support means so much to us!!!

And the father of the house that provided us a space and living


Even in his busy time,

He took me to the Daisen Mountain and such places

And telling me many many stories!!

This day, he also took me into the wilderness for a retreat


For me, there is not a place better than nature to feel the happiness


Feels like trees

are cheering for me


But this time,

Not only nature,

But many and truly many kind of people are cheering for us!!

"Keep it up!!"

Far away from London, Daisuke san is supporting us in many ways

Through Daisuke san, through Junko san,

many people are giving us cheers!

Through blog and facebook,

so many cheers and motivation from people!

And even since we arrived here in Tottori,

We were given cheers from many people for our success!

I dont have the ability to translate everything to Santosh

But I want him to feel all these support from people

Telling him, "GANBARE"! (means, "keep it up" "do your best")

Santosh, being put into a team without ways of communication,

must be very stressful for him


He have to assume

all the practice menu and instructions from coaches

by observing other's movements and facial expression


and the style of soccer is completely different between Nepal and Japan

It was very difficult and depressing for him to keep up with the speed and style of Japanese soccer


But every often, the player, Mr.Okamoto continues to make communication with Santosh!

Even spliting his focus from his own practice,

He has been supporting Santosh throughout the entire practice!

Really and truly has been a great support for Sansosh!

I wish kids could also grow up to be a wonderful player like him!

I would like to write something very honestly

This challenge for Santosh is very challenging and difficult to succeed

It has been 4 years since people were telling me his performance has been declining

And for the past 8 months, the Nepal soccer league has been recessed

In such condition, Santosh is making this trial

In Nepal, he is a hero

Everyone knows about him

Which must make him to be proud of himself

and people would treat him very respectfuly

But being such person, Santosh is rebuilding his body again

And coming from the top, he had to experience a great sense of failure

Yesterday's practice was in match situation

He could not catch up with other's movements

Was merely out of stamina

That he became so depressed about himself

I could not find a word to tell him...

The father of the house trying to refresh his feelings, asked him to go out for site seeing

but he didn't even have that energy to go out

"Did the coach told you if I can join the practice tomorrow?"

"When do we have to leave?"

In Nepal, Santosh was the youngest player to become a professional,

And he is making the record of most goals in Nepal, almost reaching to 100 goals in a season

A person who has been rewarded many times,

is being so lost of confidence that he was saying words of his broken heart.

"Most of all, I dont want to make you spend any more money on me

With my ability, I cannot make this happen"

Being so depressed,

at that night,

our host gathered people to run a encouraging party

Kids joined the event wanting to meet with Santosh


And even other guests at the restaurant encouraged Santosh to make an effort!

"Santosh Dont give up!!!"

And the father of the house,

"hold on Santosh!"

"Even if you think that you cannot make it,

There is a big difference between

Giving all that you have,

And simply giving up right now!"


After the dinner,

Santosh's feeling was moving up and down rapidly

I called to my husband for advice

Oni coach (my husband) was saying

to only focus on the strength he has, to performe his keen instict

Being told, Santosh said,

"I understand what eveyone tells me

I understand their feelings as well.

But today, I gave out my 100% performace

That is why I don't think I can make this happen.

And I dont want to waste your money and time anymore"

Telling me with such regretful expression

But I asked him,

"Then do you really understand my purpose here?"

He answered,

"To improve my soccer skill?

To do for the children?

To accumulate my experience? etc"

But I told him he is wrong

"Ofcourse that is part of it, but none of them is the main purpose!"

He was telling me I was being like a teacher in a class room and he hated it.

He was mentioning that he is regretful for not doing a training during his off season.

But I continued,

"What I truly want from you,

regardless of the situation,

in any moment,

I want you to choose to be an example for the children,

to overcome an obstacle, to make an effort, to hold on,

And to tell them what you learn from your experience

That is why, YOU HAVE to overcome this challenge right now!

Saying what you should have done or saying it is impossible,

is meaningless!

What is it that you can do now?

What is it that you can proceed from your yesterday?

By controlling your mind

And controlling your heart

Tomorrow's 100% can be more than today

So please do it!!!

If you give up right now,

Then that would really be the waste of my entire effort!!

Now is the time Santosh,


Then Santosh,

started to slam on his chest, saying




He continued over and over

To do more today than yesterday

To do more tomorrow than today

If we could renew the record of making effort everyday,

Then we wll never regret!!

And what I also discussed with Santosh is that

There's dream, hope and purpose

If we make our dream to be our hope

Then making our hope to be our purpose

And if we continue to make 100% effort,

Our dream will become our reality.

But every time our dream changes,

Our difficulties and challenge become bigger

Then gradually we have less time to feel the fun

But our joy in life becomes bigger and bigger

Today, Santosh was making his best effort!!!

He turned around his feelings, and stayed strong in his heart

To do all that he can do now

I think Santosh is going through so much and rapid growth in his heart

Sports, and not only in sports,

When a person truly commits his/her serious effort,

To become so eager for the purpose,

humans have the potential to make a growth beyond our imagination

Coach Matsunami

A man with great character

He prepared us with the video record of Gainare Tottori

And Santosh is studing this video all day long!


To make our best effort,

We are truly given so much strength from many people!!

I hope this strength will also reach to everyone!!!!

With my pray

With my heart of



I went to ring the bell at the Mt.Daisen





some more extras



what is effort ?

As I mentioned before in Facebook,

Santosh, who is a professional Soccer Player in Nepal, will going to challenge the Japanese soccer league

Honestly, I think it is very difficult.

But! there is a big difference,

when you say "it is not likely to happen"

and when you say "will make it happen no matter what!!"

what is different is what comes afterward

the learning, the satisfaction,

and most importantly,

the degree of accepting the outcome!

Since the Nepalese soccer league have been recessed for a long time,

Santosh's body was already far away from an athlete's body.

While I took him around to many places for playing soccer,

I heard many sever opinions about him, which I could not tell him directly...

But unless he can face the reality,

there is no transformation.

So I recorded his performance in my mobile phone to show him how he is playing

And little by little,

I told him about the honest opinions I heard from other players and coaches,

As well as how we, my family, feel about his current situation.

Unless we have built a trust relationship in between us,

It is very difficult to tell something negative, something hard to accept,

Because it is difficult to make him accept it in a positive way.

But on the other hand, because it is something hard to accept,

If he can accept it, then it can be a great stepping stone for him to make a great progress!!

Yesterday, suddently, Santosh told me

"Now I really know what effort is"

he said

"The effort I was making before, was not a real effort.

Ofcourse I was making the best that I thought I could, but it was not the best.

In these days in Japan, I truly made the real effort,

And now I know"

He looked at his body with happy expression

and he said, regarding his transformation,

"I am proud"

The impression I got from hearing these words from him,

Was not just "being proud"

But I could also sense the confidence and satisfaction in himself

The confidence that he is making true effort

And the satisfaction in seeing the result with his own eyes.

In the things you put your effort into

will create confidence for yourself.

I think a true confidence is something that can only be made

By making effort.

I have some photo that can show you much more dramatic,

But it would be too personal...

So, this is a photo of Santosh in the Summer


When he came back in September, he was in the same shape


His current body


For a while, when he came back for the second time,

We, my family, didnt force him as much

But as gradually, as we created our trust relationship, a bond between us,

Then one time, through argument, I became absolutely candor to him

And I claimed that I will make him much thinner!

Then only 2 days afterward,

An oppurtunity for Santosh to apply for trial test J3 (3rd division league) came to us.

An oppurtunity for Santosh to apply for J3 (3rd division league) came to us.

So we had to change it from making him thinner, to making him athletic

I completely managed his eating habit

Designed his training schedule that will make most effective training for his body

My brother, my husband and I

Have gathered all of our knowledge, experience and memories

And applied the up to date information

And ofcourse, Santosh is making the most effort

But I think effort is something difficult to make only by yourself.

Not only in Sports, but also in job

There are people who supports you

People who make the same effort with you


When there are people cheering for you without being aware

Or giving you words and advices

And making you motivated!

When everything becomes together

An effort

Can become somthing beyond our imagination!

Almost every often, I am driving Santosh to Tokyo for an oppurtunity to practice soccer

( It takes 3 hours by car )

Seeing these beautiful scenery on our way


My children is also cooperating to endure beng away with their mother

For Santosh

And for the project of FC Reale

This is also a different kind of effort that they are making

And I think effort will nurture everyone's soul

To build a confidence in ourselves

And to make our life filled with fulfillment!

Today's morning,

We drove to Tokyo again for morning practice

People who knows the true effort


I dont think true effort is about enduring the pain and suffering

It is more about how much you can make your dream in a realistic way

How much you can be true to your goal

To be true to yourself

To be true to your people


To be true to your actions

That is how I think is what true effort is


Again and again,

For supporting us and cheering us,

Thank you very much ! ! ! ! !


I am in Kenya

Saying farewell to Matija in Croatia,

To make necessary procedure, I had to go through immigration in Germany

Saying good bye to my kids at the airport of Munich , Germany …

Seeing my kids sad faces behind their attitude of trying to be strong

I told to myself ,

" I have to do my best ! ! "

But then,

Their flight was canceled, so when I went back into the transit area, I got to see them again ^^@

We had many incidents in this trip , but I am now in Kenya!

I only knew the face of animal kingdom

But the place I am going is the one of the biggest slum in the wirld

It was not a vast savanna to the horizon with blue sky

It was miuntains of trash

And modest houses

But I really liked their charming coloring

Yet, such casual thought blown away in this sever environment

In this trip , I am here for a different project as I usually come for LOLO SITOA's actuvity

It is a huge project partnered with my favorite people

People living this reality so strongly

That I am not so sure if I am good enough to be their partner

And they have such a passionate spirit

Which I would love to introduce about them in another occasion

Which put me into a thinking that "what am I able to do ? "

Not in a way of "what can I do " but in a l senae of "what is it that U can do !"

Then I noticed that I can be active in different places since they have little time to do so

If I can use my shop to manage production and sales ti make this project as bigger as possible

Then more people will be involved , and more awareness can be influenced

Simply , I thought that would be it

Through soccer , in this slum named Kibera , I am thinking

If we can make a project for the children in Japan and for the adults in Japan,

To convey a spirit

To convey something uplifting in their passion!

This is our team in Kibera for this project !!!!

I thought I would be terrified just by myself as a woman, and wanted someone who knows soccer

So I asked Santosh ( professional soccer player and Reale nepal coach ) to come from Nepal !

( Although he is a captain of the professional team, and they are playing fir a tournament today, he canceled his participation so he can come with me … !

I am so sorry , and soooo much thanks !! )

These are the members who created an active community in Kibera

They are also living in Kibera, but they are working every day to change the reality of children in Kibera !

Looking at their tough spirit , I really felt I still have so much to learn

I felt that I have to be much stronger

Then I equipped my camera and video camera

To glimpse into the lives of children playing for the Kibera Soccer League

I took off to the streets of slum city

Apparently, it would be very dangerous, so I hired two police officers

And also being told to bring 3 members from the foundation that lives in Kibera

Such a huge rifle and automatic guns …

The moment I saw them, I got so nervous

Yes, slum is very terrifying

But rather, I am so not used to being around with these guns following me …

My focus was so out of shotting photos

And the ground was always like this


I had to direct all my focus in the act of walking

Sometimes getting those zinc roots on my head

But children were full of smiles

And the kids from the team seemed so honorable

And most of all the adults who involved in this project,

The coordinator of Kibera Soccer team ,

And the coach member of the soccer team

They live in Kibera , and took me around the slum city

Had si much integrity inside !!!!

With such passion !!!

That they were proud to introduce me to their slum city

"We are tough!"

He said.

Although living in slum , although they do not have money,

They didn't show me any sadness or such feelings !

I don't kow how to describe this ….

But they have this special feeling

May be because they are headind to the future with full of hopes

Mothers of the children playing for the team

I was even surprised with myself feeling a sense of hope in this sever environment

Which you can see how I am not focused in shooting photos ….

Mothers are not even in the picture …

It was truly amazing how they managed to live in this city.

These are the people who came out to look for a job.

Every day is a survival for them

But what I am truly amazed is how different they appear by the spirits they have towards life !!

The people I met were so full of passion !

They were so bright

And they were carrying a dream in their life !!!

So what I want to say here ,

I am NOT going to talk about how difficult and sad this reality is here


It's not about how the world is filled with unfair lives.

But when you see these peiple,

No matter what kind of environment they are in ,

When a person carries a passion and dream in his/ her heart

They can be so proud !

Can be so attractuve !!

They looked so much stronger and vibrant !

Than this women coming from Japan (me )

That is what I want to convey to everyone !


In the life of human being , is so magnificent and can be so full of joy !

As they have conveyed this message to me,

I am very proud

To convey these amazing lives of people living in Kibera!

That is what I feel !

May this project will last for long long time,

And for my wish to initiate something in the heart of others as many as possible,

I will give in all my effort to do the best that I can possibly do !

Seeing these wonderful people in Kibera,

I thought I will wait for my visit to enjoy the animal kingdom for several years later

To be proud of myself as much as they are,

I am and will continue,

to LIVE !!!!!

As a mother


It is Aya

It is late night, and I am updating a blog from my cell phone.

Today, after coming back from the soccer practice,

My husband ( head coach) told me before putting the kids into sleep

Regarding the last blog, there is a story that continues

For the NODA Racing Academy collaboration camp,

We are bringing 9 selected children from FC Reale

The selected children from the final decision was only 7 children

We could not decide to choose two others, because

It may be too generous,

But we wanted to give one more chance to the children

All coach members agreed to do

That teaching them about the importance of never giving up, and what it is to never give up,

We wanted to observe their attitude afterward and make the final decision for the last 2 players

What we decided to tell the children, is that

Within the following three days, the children have to speak out their desire that they want to go

And we will do interview after one week.

The qualification is above 5th grade ( age 10)

And my daughter, Akane, is also in 5th grade

But at the previous first selection, she was not selected by the coach members

My daughter is always shy

Often in soccer games, she fear to make mistake in her performance

I am wondering whether she is getting this stubborn and reckless blood that I have .... ?

But such girl have came to her father (head coach) , as the first one to come, and said !!!!

" I want to join the camp !!"

she said

" I truly want to become a professional soccer player, and make everyone happy "


Honestly, I was very very happy.

All the coach members of FC Reale Japan have children.

And coaches are most strict to their own children

I think they are going through many kinds of feelings as a parent and child relationship

Which is also the same in our household.

Every child wants to dominate his/her parents

They want their parents to only focus on themselves

They want themselves to be their parents' number one


During practice, they have to call their father as "coach"

And Akane's father is always thinking about Reale

He is thinking about Reale soccer whether he is awake or asleep


And her mother is always away from home


Not just home, but I am not even in Japan

Even if they want to hear my voice through phone, they cannot even do that

Even when I am at home, I am busy doing work, or at rest for a broken body from the strain of long trip

I question myself about my roll , what is a

" Mother "

I am not able to do mother's job sufficiently

Especially that children is able to sense the direction of their parents' focus

I think they are going through an enormously lonesome feelings

But no one knows

What is the happiness for children, and what is the right answer

That is why, I want them to develop their spirit.

Regardless of the environment and situation they are in,

If they could feel the happiness

And if they could live with the feeling of


Then all the things they go through will be the right answer!

My thinking is that

Right answer is something that should be made by yourself

That is why, my daughter's action this time was a great, enormous surprise and joy

And especially

" I want to make everyone happy "


When I heard it, I was thinking that she will find out some day

That this particular feeling of her will actually bring happiness to her life

Being raised by such a neglecting mother,

I was very very happy to see that

Gradually, but in a definite way,

She is learning the part that I wanted her to know the most

In such late night, I really wanted to write about this

Excuse me for writing as a fond mother :)

Being allowed by my children and husband to experience a life as a mother,

I am truly thankful from my heart


But I am definitely disqualified to do the mother's job ^^;

That is why, I want to always remind myself

That I will always

Be fully aware of my children's feelings!

Even raising my own children, I cannot do everything by myself

Anything that I do really cannot be done by myself

That is why,

Thank you so much !

For everyday

Full of thankfulness !



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